Miss Ann Says

thoughts from everyday life
Miss Ann Says
  • About Me & Media Bio:
  • Speaker/Writer
  • Tag: NYC

    • The NY subway & me

      Posted at 4:34 pm by missannsays, on February 14, 2019

      I don’t know if you can teach an old dog new tricks but I do know that as a woman of a certain age I am still capable of learning new things. The last few months have proven that to be true. My approach to learning something new is not necessarily the way the younger set would learn or do it but if the result is the same what does it matter. If I need a paper map to get a sense of the area, then buy a paper map. Barnes ‘n Noble still sells them.

      My move to NYC forced caused me to learn to use mass transit. I have ridden the Underground in London, the light rail is Seattle, the trains and subway in Japan, the Metro in DC but the prospect of using the NYC subway system terrified me. Mostly because I don’t understand how it works and on cop shows someone is always pushed in front of a train.

      In my teens and young adult years, travel into Manhattan from Bergen County, NJ was via the Shortline Bus to The Port Authority then walk or catch the 8th Avenue bus uptown to dance class. The use of the subway was forbidden by my parents, my Dad insisted “NO SUBWAY!” which looking back was the right call because the subways of the 1970’s were an entirely different beast than today. As an adult, the easiest way from Orange County to Manhattan was to drive so that is what I did for years. Now living in Brooklyn it was time to put my big girl pants on and do this.

      Back in the early fall after a day with city friends, they decided I needed to do an escorted ride on the subway as a way to get back to my car. Actually I was going to walk the many blocks but “they” said

      “if you are moving here you have to learn the trains.”

      “No!?! Really, I can walk. I don’t have a metro card.”

      “I have an extra and J is going the same direction.”

      Oh, no, this is happening. J is a true New Yorker so she realized the train we needed was at the platform and started walking faster and faster. I struggled to keep up. She got to the train as the door was closing and pushed it open like some kind of superhero. “Come on. Get in.” Being crushed by the door is a fear of mine but I said a little prayer and dove in. Even in your 60’s peer pressure can be a positive motivator. J reminded me she was getting off at the next stop and I should go one more stop and get off.

      “Just get your bearings when you get to the street so you don’t walk in the wrong direction.”

      Alrighty, then. I made it to my car. Drove home. Later emailed friends to let them know I appreciated the test run. Okay, all of that was just a little background information to set up my learning mass transit story.

      Fast forward a few weeks and it is now the time to do this! My daughter instructed me to use the map app on my phone for directions. She added me to Find Friends. I think she wasn’t sure Mom can do this. I read and reread the directions because I didn’t want to look at the them on the train. Don’t want to look like a newbe. By the way most people are looking at their phones while on the train. I had my metro card. Of course I didn’t swipe it fast enough so I couldn’t get through the turnstile. Calm down and do it again. Once on the platform I stood with my back to the wall acting like a confident New Yorker. Oh, my! What was I thinking? Breathe. The train arrived I got on, I got off. It was all good. I was proud of myself. Slowly over the next few days/weeks I learned a few things:

      1. The platform you get off the train isn’t the one you will get back on the train. I know that should be obvious but it was an aha moment for me.
      2. The subway system is actually well marked. Reading the signs is helpful, really helpful.
      3. UP in a subway elevator means Upper Platform not up.
      4. I don’t like platforms that have trains coming on both sides because there is no wall to stand against. There is usually a beam, bench or garbage can that can be a substitute wall.
      5. If I get on the wrong train, I can get off at the next stop and find the right train. I won’t be stuck riding it forever like Charlie in that M.T.A. song from when I was a kid. Anyway, he was in Boston not New York.
      6. There are some interesting people so I need to be aware not afraid. Well maybe a little afraid.
      7. People will offer me a seat which does make me feel old but grateful.
      8. If I follow the directions, it isn’t that hard to add money to a metro card or even get a new one.
      9. Those subway system apps are very useful.
      10. When the guy announces “mind the gap as you exit” I won’t need to do a grand jete to make it across, hopefully just a bigger step and a little prayer will suffice.

      “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” CS Lewis

      What new thing would you like to conquer? I would love to know.

      Take care. Be well. Serve others.

      Hugs, Ann

      Photo by Fancycrave.com on Pexels.com

      FYI: I haven’t seened an empty train. There is usually lots of people. All kinds of people which makes it a great experience. I love people watching.

      Posted in daily life, memories | 0 Comments | Tagged NYC
    • a bit of Chapter 3 – No Surprises: navigating tragedy with faith, family and the FDNY.

      Posted at 5:08 am by missannsays, on September 18, 2018

      Chapter 3

      Manhattan, Meetings and Memorials –  first draft (unedited)

      Tuesday September 18 was the first time I ventured into the city since the attacks.  Squad 41 notified me of a FDNY meeting and their offer to pick me up and take me to one of the various gathering spots from where I would be moved to the actual meeting. It was all quite mysterious. I supposed the intention was two-fold – one keep the media away and to protect the identity and privacy of the family members. I decided that we would get ourselves into the city. Manhattan had been my stomping grounds during my teens and twenties. In recent years trips into the city were for Christmas decoration viewing or museum trips with my girls. I didn’t see the need for a FDNY escort so Tony, Carol’s husband, drove me, Christine and Emily in. Meghan stayed at “Auntie” Carol’s house.

      As much as I didn’t feel I needed a FDNY escort, I felt the need to represent my firefighter husband in an honoring way. I carefully choose my attire to show respect for the importance of a meeting that would be attended by the governor, mayor and other city officials. I was shocked when we arrived and there were people wearing t-shirts, shorts and flip-flops.

      The drive into the city was surreal. Men in full military garb with the biggest guns I had ever seen were guarding the George Washington Bridge. I felt like I had been transported to another country.  We don’t have military on our bridges. This is the United States of America.  Looking at the skyline, I had no idea where the towers had stood. They were south of the Empire State Building but where?

      Christine commented “I thought I would know where they had been. Like there would be a cardboard cut-out or something?”

      We chose the Fire Zone at Rockefeller Center as our meeting spot. We were met by concerned faces, offered cups of water, cookies, restrooms and assurances the buses would be arrive shortly. Plain clothes police or security or whomever directed us to the buses as they received instructions in their earpieces and spoke into their sleeves.

      As we crossed the closed off street, Emily said “Mom, I think we are in a bad movie.”

      “Me, too.”

      Boarding the bus, I saw faces with the same dazed look I am sure my face had. Most people had family or friends with them, my heart was deeply saddened at the sight of a young man who was all alone. Is he representing his dad? He is too young to have to be the man of the family.

      The bus drove a few blocks to a large hotel where we were directed to a ballroom. We found four seats at a table and introduced ourselves. The one young woman was the fiancé of a firefighter. The other three people were the wife and grown children of an FDNY officer.

      I glanced around the room to see if I knew anyone. Since my interactions with the other wives from Squad 41 was only at the yearly Christmas party and annual dinner dance, I didn’t think I would recognize anyone. Over the past few days, I had spoken to one of the other Squad 41 wives whose husband was also listed as missing.  I had promised her if/when the time came to declare them dead I would take that first step. I would take the lead.

      Mayor Giuliana, Governor Pataki, Chief Thomas Von Essen from the FDNY and the Medical Examiner spoke. The purpose of the meeting was to inform us that the mission was going from rescue to recovery. They had found no one alive in days so it was time to change the focus. The heavy equipment was going to be brought in to move the debris. There was discussion about DNA samples and opportunity to give DNA before you left. In the years since that meeting, some FDNY widows have come to call it “the leave your DNA at the door meeting.” The formal meeting part was followed by a question and answer time during which time many people myself included wandered around looking for familiar faces.

      I eventually saw the other wives from Squad 41. I didn’t really know these women as personal friends. Our husbands worked together but I didn’t know them. So here we were navigating this terrible event together but not together. I remember hugs, brief conversations and the promise to pray for each other. At one point, I said “why don’t we pray right now.” Did I just say that out loud?

      I found Tony while the other wives gathered their families. The scene is so vivid in my mind. I’m standing in this large ballroom, the noise level was high, there were people all around, the commissioner of the FDNY was onstage answering someone’s question and we are holding hands in a circle. And for a moment the other voices in the room fade away and there was only this circle of people and Tony’s voice offering a prayer of hope. More hugs and promises to stay in touch.

      The next morning, I informed Christine that it was time to have a memorial service. It was time to pronounce Bruce dead. I decided that there were three groups of people that I needed to know were okay with the idea before I made plans – my daughters, my mother-in-law and the Squad 41 firefighters. In a phone conversation with my sister-in-law, I realized my mother-in-law had scheduled a meeting with her lawyer to change her will. I took that as a sign that she assumed Bruce was dead. I mentioned to Charlie that I wanted to have a memorial service. He assured me that it is up to me when and where but that the fire department hadn’t given up hope of finding the guys.

      That evening, Christine and I sat on the living room floor with Emily and Meghan.

      “Where do you think Daddy is right now?”

      “Heaven.”

      “Then it is time we plan a memorial service.”

      “But what if we are wrong? What if they find Daddy?”

      “I would like nothing better than for Daddy to walk into his own service. I don’t          have to be right, but it is time.”

      Posted in daily life, faith, memories, September 11 | 0 Comments | Tagged family, NYC, respect
    • The Sphere

      Posted at 4:15 pm by missannsays, on August 27, 2017

       

       

      IMG_0500

      Underneath that white sheeting is the Sphere. The Sphere that was sculpted by Fritz Koenig and sat in Tobin Plaza at the World Trade Center from 1971 to 2001. The Sphere that is one of the few remaining pieces of the original World Trade Center that still exist. Personally I don’t have a connection to the Sphere. I didn’t see it everyday as I went to work but I have friends who did. Last week the Sphere was moved from Battery Park where it set since 2002 to its new home in Liberty Park. I have friends who are upset by the media saying it came home because to them it didn’t come home. It doesn’t sit on the National September 11 Memorial as many believe it should.

      Last Wednesday as I supported a 9/11 Tribute Museum walking tour and saw the Sphere in its new spot for the first time, I was struck by a few thoughts I wanted to share. I was glad for my friends. Many fought long and hard to preserve it. Well done. I wondered if sitting where it does it isn’t a statement to the fact that we can’t really ever go home? And then again sitting as it does overlooking the Memorial is it watching over or guarding its original home?  Finally once it is uncovered the damage it displays will speak volumes to what happened on September 11, 2001 in a way that the beautiful plaza doesn’t.

      So to the Sphere I say “Welcome home to the neighborhood! Glad you could join us.”

      According to a fellow docent, it will be unveiled in the near future. I look forward to seeing it.

       

       

      Posted in September 11, then & now | 0 Comments | Tagged community, NYC, random thoughts, tours
    • We never called it Ground Zero

      Posted at 8:00 am by missannsays, on September 12, 2016

      As we walk diagonally across the Memorial, Steven* in true gentlemanly fashion is carrying the bag containing the head sets. On this walking tour, I am the lead docent and Steven is my support person.  Steven is new to the program and is a little apprehensive but when he speaks of “his guys” you hear and see his passion and expertise. You see the firefighter. It makes me smile how the firefighters Steven included always try to take care of me. I have carried that bag back to the Tribute Center many times through the ten years I have been volunteering.  I appreciate the gesture. I am grateful but I am capable. I am not the “little FDNY widow”.  In reality, Steven is actually shorter than I am and we are about the same age.

      The Memorial is busy. There is a gentle buzz of activity.  I notice faces of visitors from many nations, hear softly spoken words, see tears being wiped, selfies being snapped and the sound of the south waterfall. As we walk along Steven suddenly comments “We (FDNY) never called it Ground Zero.”  We stop walking and I nod in agreement. The media said Ground Zero and to me that term Ground Zero always brought the image of a red and white target.  Steven continues “We called it the Pile and as we got lower we called it the Pit.”

      The Pile I had seen that for myself on September 28, 2001.  I remember that massive hole (the Pit) in the ground from when I started volunteering at the Tribute Center in 2006. We continue walking and I add “and now it is the Plaza.” He nods in agreement.

      Our conversation confirms in my mind something I had been pondering for a while, this place and I had been on parallel journeys since September 11, 2001. The World Trade Center which I had only visited twice before the attacks had become a travel companion. We had weathered the attacks, sorted through the debris, filled the void and remembered those we lost as we continued on.

      *name has been changed

       

      Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment | Tagged 9/11 Tribute Center, little things, NYC, September 11
    • My ABC’s from 2015.

      Posted at 12:48 pm by missannsays, on December 30, 2015

      Golden glitter

       

      A is for adventures. A week in Florida Keys, a weekend in Chicago and being a tourist in my own city all qualify.

      B is for ballet. I taught one class a week at a Modern Dance studio.

      C is for Colton James. He was born on April 29, 2015.

      D is for Dunkin Donuts. I drank quite a few cups of coffee.

      E is for Eagle Rock Resort. Enjoyed my cabin and the amenities.

      F is for faith, family and friends. I can’t do life without them.

      G is for Grammy. My new title thanks to Colton James. 🙂

      H is for hope. My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.

      I is for interview. I did a couple of those.

      J is for Joy.

      K is for kindness.

      L is for Library Book Club. Still going strong on the first Tuesday of each month.

      M is for my Mum. She is doing well even though she is confined to a wheelchair.

      N is for nieces and nephews. 7 plus 12 “grand” nieces and nephews. 🙂

      O is for opportunities. I am blessed with many.

      P is for published. “Unexpected Blessings” in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Volunteer and Giving Back edition and a devotional in The Upper Room.

      Q is for quizzing. After 19 years, Eastern Regional Quiz at ENC was my last hurrah as Metro New York Children’s Ministries director for the Church of the Nazarene.

      S is for shore. Spent a few days at the Jersey Shore with the Bowers.

      T is for tea with Miss Carol. Always a treat.

      U is for university. I spoke on two campuses.

      V is for volunteering at the 9/11 Tribute Center.

      W is for writing.

      X is for eXercise.

      Y is for year. Hard to believe another has come and gone.

      Z is for zero. The number of regrets I have.

      In 2016, I want to read and write more. I want to be present and not distracted. I want to be who God intended me to be.

       

       

       

      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged 9/11 Tribute Center, Dunkin Donuts, family, following Jesus, friendship, gated communities, little things, NYC, telling the next generation, travel, writing
    • getting back in the groove

      Posted at 4:15 pm by missannsays, on October 27, 2015

      groove

      Sometimes with writing (blogging) as with other things in life you just seem to fall out of step. A new commitment to babysit my grandson two days a week, add to that a couple of speaking engagements and interviews, increased travel to visit my mom and blogging fell to the bottom of the pile. I missed blogging (and I have some other writing I need to work on) so here is my public announcement that I am picking up my pen (well not really because I type) and putting my random ramblings on paper (screen) on a more regular basis. 🙂 I am getting back in the groove.

      First up is a few quick recommendations for visiting the September 11 Memorial. Recently people from all parts (former high school classmates, pastors, etc.)  of my life have been asking “can you explain the difference between the Memorial, Tribute Center, One World Observatory and Museum to me?”

      So here goes:

      1.  9/11 Tribute Center, 120 Liberty Street is 5 small galleries and walking tours of the September 11 Memorial Plaza. The daily walking tours are the crown jewel of the Tribute Center. Survivors, downtown residents, family members, first responders and volunteers during the rescue/recovery give 75 minute walking tours that include the history of the original World Trade Center, timeline of the attacks, rebuilding, symbolism of the Memorial and most importantly their personal story.  9/11 Tribute Center tours started in 2005 and the galleries opened in 2006. This is who I volunteer with.  tributewtc.org
      2.  The National September 11 Memorial is open daily from 7:30am – 9:00pm. It is an open plaza. You don’t need tickets to visit. Take the time to walk around at least one of the pools so you can experience the size of the buildings. Pools are within the original foot[print of the building. The row of trees behind you when you are at the pool marks the walls of the original buildings – you are standing in the original buildings. The Memorial opened on September 11, 2011.  911memorial.org
      3. The National September 11 Memorial Museum is open Sunday – Thursdays from 9:00am – 8:00pm and Fridays – Saturdays from 9:00am – 9:00pm but last entry is 6:00pm/7:00pm respectively. You need to purchase tickets online. Allow at least 2 hours to visit and be kind to yourself. The museum has a lot of amazing artifacts. It is arranged with a in memoriam section and a historical section. Don’t miss the video from NASA. The Museum opened in May of 2014.  911memorial.org
      4. One World Observatory is open daily from 9:00am – 8:00pm with last entry at 7:15pm. One World Observatory is the observation deck of the new 1WTC. You will need to purchase tickets. It opened in May of 2015. oneworldobservatory.com

       

      My thoughts:

      You will get more out of visiting The National September 11Memorial if you do a 9/11 Tribute Center walking tour.

      If you are not from “around these parts”, do a 9/11 Tribute Center walking tour of The National September 11 Memorial and go to One World Observatory.

      If you have children do a walking tour and then decide if The National September 11 Museum is appropriate for your family. Remember to your children September 11 is history, to you it is current event.

      All four places are worth your time and money but you need to pace yourself so do a walking tour (& galleries) your first visit, the museum another visit and the observatory another time.

      The Museum is artifacts and information.

      The walking tours are stories and inspiration.

      The Observatory is cool views.

       

       

      https://missannsays.com/2014/05/18/national-september-11-memorial-museum/

      https://missannsays.com/2014/05/13/travel-tuesdays-s2e2-911-memorial-museum/

       

       

       

       

      Posted in daily life, September 11, Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged National September 11 Museum, NYC, September 11, travel thoughts, writing
    • Travel Tuesdays S3E1- The Whitney

      Posted at 2:23 pm by missannsays, on June 23, 2015

       

      Yesterday friends and I visited The Whitney Museum of American Art at it’s new location in the Meatpacking District of Manhattan. Cool neighborhood. According to The Whitney’s website:

      “The Whitney Museum of American Art was borne out of sculptor Gertrude Vanderbilt Whitney’s advocacy on behalf of living American artists. At the beginning of the twentieth century, artists with new ideas found it nearly impossible to exhibit or sell their work in the United States. Recognizing the obstacles these artists faced, Mrs. Whitney began purchasing and showing their work, thereby becoming the leading patron of American art from 1907 until her death in 1942.”

      Touring The Whitney was wonderful primarily because  whatever adventure these friends and I embark on is fun but secondarily because the guide/docent we had was excellent.  She (Paula) made me want to learn more about American art history. The way she explained various pieces was so informative but also insightful. She was obviously extremely well-informed but her passion for American art shone through. She made me think and wonder. The current exhibit is entitled “America Is Hard to See”.

      “The title, America Is Hard to See, comes from a poem by Robert Frost and a political documentary by Emile de Antonio. Metaphorically, the title seeks to celebrate the ever-changing perspectives of artists and their capacity to develop visual forms that respond to the culture of the United States. It also underscores the difficulty of neatly defining the country’s ethos and inhabitants, a challenge that lies at the heart of the Museum’s commitment to and continually evolving understanding of American art.”

      One of the most thought-provoking pieces for me was Fred Wilson’s Guarded View. It is four headless black mannequins dressed in museum guard uniforms. Paula’s comments about the piece truly made me think  – the guards in museums are guarding the art on view but they themselves are on view. However, we don’t see them. She challenged us to look around the room. Even in NYC one of the most culturally diverse places in the world most of the visitors were white and the guards were black. I have been thinking about this piece in light of current events. I have pondering what was written about the piece. I was struck by the fact that Fred Wilson was born the same year I was.

      IMG_1287

      IMG_1288

      I have a love/hate relationship with art and art museums in particular. Partly because I don’t always believe some of things we are “told” about the piece was why the artist did what they did. I mean maybe they just liked that color paint, or they didn’t have a smaller canvas or whatever. My “issues” with that stem from being a dancer and having people say “they got the piece”. Really?!?  because sometimes that music was used because it was the right length and it inspired me and not for any other reason. All that to say I am sometimes leery of explanations of art but I have to say yesterday I gained a better understanding of American art, my curiosity was piqued, I experienced the connection between art and culture and isn’t that what a museum is supposed to do. Thank you Paula and The Whitney Museum.

      To plan your visit go to http://whitney.org/

       






       

       

       

      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged museum, NYC, The Whitney, travel thoughts
    • Being a tourist in my own city – Merchant’s House

      Posted at 12:51 pm by missannsays, on February 25, 2015

      A few weeks ago friends and I visited The Merchant’s House Museum located at 29 East Fourth Street in Manhattan http://merchantshouse.org/ . I wasn’t that familiar with the neighborhood and didn’t know what to expect so I ended up standing on the street corner glaring at my iPhone looking more like a tourist than I like to. Trying to act like I knew where I was going even though I had actually spun around in a circle I finally walked back the way I had come and found the house. I guess I was expecting a big sign or something but it looked quite ordinary on the outside but the inside was worth the trip.

      The members of the Tredwell family lived in the house for almost 100 years. The house was built in 1832 “on spec”  and sold to SeburyTredwell in 1840, a family member lived there until 1933 and in 1936 it became a museum. The home still houses most of the original furniture, many personal items as well as other period pieces. According to the website, “In New York City, it has been awarded landmark status not only for its 1832 late-Federal brick exterior but also for its Greek revival interior rooms.” Our tour started in the basement and proceeded through the main floor entertaining space and ended in the servant’s quarters on the third floor. Being a Downton Abbey fan, it was interesting to see the American merchant class version of life with servants complete with a bell system, separate entrance and back stairs. The other think about the tour that I found very interesting was to ponder all the events and advancements that occurred in the 100 years the family owned the house.

      The Merchant House is currently endangered due to the proposed construction of a hotel next door. To read about the issues surrounding the merchant house visit http://merchantshouse.org/endangered. I would suggest adding Merchant House to your NYC sightseeing list. It won’t be the flashiest thing or the newest or even the oldest but it will be worth the trip.

      Merchants House
      fireplace in family room
      kitchen with bell system

      fireplace, oven
      bell system
      main floor

      family
      servants quarters

      Posted in Uncategorized | 0 Comments | Tagged Downton Abbey, Merchant's House, NYC, travel
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